Judge Me!

Alright sports fans! It is now time to play: "Dan: dull-wit or sharp-wit." This is the hit game where I describe something that happened to me and tell you my reaction and let you decided: am I half witted or fully witted?

Today's set-up: Dan walks in to the barber shop to get a quick hair cut.

From the moment I sat down, I knew this barber was a piece of work. She immediately launched into a soliloquy about her son as she began to cut my hair. I mean immediately, she did not even ask me what I wanted done. But apparently her son had hair like mine so she said she knew exactly how to style it. I said,"great, maybe I can learn something." That was my first mistake.

She then proceeded to describe - in great detail - everything she was doing as she did it. Every snip, clip, trim... like she was doing the director's commentary on the DVD extras of the hair cut movie.

Then came the part where we style the hair. Here she said she'd show me the trick that she taught her son. I was intrigued... "go on." Then came the pain. She said to style hair you must first really massage the gel into the roots of the hair... massage isn't the right word... it was more like giving my hair a good pummeling.

"Then," she said, "the hair must be dried." So then next ten minutes were spent with the hair dryer on the hottest setting shooting hot air into my ear canal. "Now we can really style it" she announced. I was still with her, hoping for some stupendous result. But when I put my glasses on and took a look, I quickly realized this was one of the worst and most uneven chop jobs of my life. I looked like how I imagine Medusa looks when she first rolls out of bed after a long night of turning people to stone.

And here comes the part where you get to vote...

She had spent so much time with me - almost an hour for what is usually a 5-10 minute job - and seemed to invest herself so heavily in my hair that I ended up leaving about twice the tip that I normally would (and I'm normally a pretty good tipper). I just felt guilty since she had put so much time and effort into destroying my hair.

So, for the leaving of a good tip for a terrible service, what do you say: Am I dull or sharp, halfly or fully witted? Let's answer this question once a for all.


Anonymous said...

lolol. Nicely written.
chuckled the whole way through, perhaps because it happened to me 2 weeks ago which has led me to consider shaving my whole hair off.

My judgement - I wouldn't say you're exactly a half-wit, just extremely polite and conscious of the "feelings" of others. Some people are able to just close all that off; and I wouldn't necessarily call them fully witted either.

I'd say you're half way between half and full, maybe three quarters :-)

Great post.

ZyVu xox

BellaMonroe said...

i realy like this post. thankfully i cant really relate because i am her son in this story, what i mean is my mom is a hair dresser so i never worrie. im going to say you are fully witted because you made someone happy and didnt let your hair upset you. its the little things thatll kill you &&you just let it go. =] just think of it this way if you had been on an episode of boilling points you would have won 100 bucks.


Marcus said...

Half-wit! The lady forfeited her right to a great tip when she did not ask you what you were looking for. Assumptions give you big asses. Or something like that.

The only reason you are not a no-wit is because you were kind. And that is good.


Delectable Decadence said...

I stumbled across your blog, and this is the first thing I read. I'm going to go ahead and say pretty dull. First of all she began without asking. Second of all she threw in the kid card... pretty easy snag for people there since you can't outwardly say the kid looks horrible. You always feel obligated to just be kind. I'll give you kudos for being nice, but she probably con'd you in all honesty.

Rohan said...

1. You're a dull-wit for letting her take control of the situation. You could've been more assertive, it avoids tears, yeah?

2. You're a half-wit for leaving double the tip. What if that encouraged her behavior to do it to another customer? But hey, at least someone else would tell her off - not you, right?

3. You're a full wit for avoiding the confrontation with her. No point in making things worse by hurting her feelings and getting her husband set onto you.

4. You're a sharp wit for posting this experience :D

Rapter01 said...

you are almost fully witted in this article. thanks. its a wonderful post though you suffered a bit for getting a stuff like this for your blog. keep telling your amazing experiments (experiences) like this...!!

Don't unplug your hub said...

I'm just clicking through blogs seeing if I can find anything different or unusual. Your blog has appeared twice -I dismissed it first time sorry. Blogs never appear twice at random so I decided to stick around. Unfortunately I can't see where to click to be a follower. Maybe I'll happen by again by chance. Hope so. Keep writing.

Jinni said...

This totally made me chuckle because I have sat down in salon chairs and have had people chop my hair off. SMH However I would have to say you are a dimwit in this instance. When someone does not do a good job they should not be rewarded... this may be me but eh I am a BITCH!

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JLTan said...

Your story highlights the importance of communication; especially the feedback loop in it.

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Jess said...

I can't judge you because I've done the exact same thing. First of all, it's just hair. Second, how can you (or I) crush the hopes of a complete stranger who has so little talent and so much hope? It's not like it's up to you to put her in her place. Time will do that when she has no repeat customers.
The true victim is her son. He has to keep getting that haircut!

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bzirkone said...

Good story. I say this has nothing to do with wit. You are just a nice guy.

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